Tuesday, April 29, 2014


I haven't been able to fall asleep lately, even more so than usual. Part of it is stress about work, part of it is stress about IF and part of it is good TV... ok maybe not good tv.. but tv.

Things with work have been INSANE lately. Like, I need help soon or I they'll find me weeping and rocking balled up in a corner of a supply closet somewhere. I can't seem to get these people to understand deadlines so I'm always rushed because of other people's poor planning, or just total disregard to my time. I had a project that had to go out the door for a client today, one that typically takes about 5 business days to turn around, get emailed to me last night at 6pm. So I went to email it over to the team before I left this morning... my emails didn't stop so I ended up working from home because I couldn't get away long enough to get dressed or justify the 40 minute drive in. The great thing is, my boss has my back. He truly understands what I'm dealing with and knows that I'm doing the best job possible with what I have.

On the IF front, I'm at a crossroads. I got my CD21 bloodwork done yesterday (still haven't O'd, I KNOW I haven't). I've tried to schedule N's SA but every time he's tried to call to make the appointment, they didn't answer. So I called and left a message today... Let's hope they call back soon.

At the conference, I met the RE I really think I want to go to. She has the best success rates in the city. Some people don't like her because she only takes the "good" candidates to ensure her score stays high. Too high or too low of a BMI and she won't do a cycle. I understand why some people might not like that, but I also respect her decision to do so. She's very straightforward, very to the point and matter of fact. I like that and I think it will be good for hubs as well. He's a numbers and facts guy. The only thing is... she doesn't do just timed intercourse cycles from what I'm seeing. It looks like she does an IUI no matter what (again, bolstering her numbers). And I understand the science behind it. If she's forcing ovulation she wants to make sure the sperm is there and the numbers she shows supports it. But I don't know if we're there yet.

I don't know why. Maybe it's because I don't want to feel like we need THAT much help? I don't know. I guess I just want to try without it. I don't know. I think I'm taking a page from hubs book and just taking this as it comes.

We'll see. Maybe I'll be one of those people that just does a round of Clomid and gets knocked up... fingers crossed.


  1. You never just clomid may do the trick! Do whatever feels right for you :)

  2. I think you have nothing to lose by at least getting a consultation with the RE you met that you liked. One of my regrets during my TTC journey was staying so long in my previous clinic because I wanted to be one of those women who could get pregnant doing un-monitored and un-medicated IUIs (even though honestly I truly believed that this wasn't the right solution for me). Because of my BMI that clinic didn't want to do medicated IUIs and since I was not on medication they didn't feel the need to monitor me, even though I was getting conflicted results with my OPKs and temp charts and never truly knew when I ovulated. Anyways, I finally listened to my gut feeling and decided to get a second opinion elsewhere. It was the best decision I took. I found out so much about my own cycles.

    Which ever road you decide to take just trust your gut feeling. Crossing my fingers for you!

    1. That's what I'm worried about!! I think doing 2 rounds of Clomid with my regular Dr would be plenty, plus it gives us time to save up even more. Right now, that feels right. now I reserve the right to change that opinion at any time lol

  3. Glad you found an RE you like, although I totally understand your hesitation and questioning whether you really need THAT MUCH help. I hope things get better at work for you - sounds stressful! Fingers crossed for you!

  4. I definitely feel you on not wanting to jump into IUIs. I'm torn between finding an RE and just taking a few rounds of Clomid prescribed by my GYN. It just feels like the first step down a road that ends at IVF, which is scary as hell.