Sunday, January 26, 2014

Diary 1/9

Another day, another negative test. I feel like I should be pregnant by now. I know it's not fully rational, it's only been 2 cycles and even then I'm not sure if i even ovulated either time. I mean, technically, I guess I'm still in my second cycle. It's been 28 days since my last period. So if I wasn't broken.. If i was normal, I should be starting today.

But instead I lay here, an emotional wreck with boobs that feel twice the weight as normal. WTF mother nature, you are cruel enough to make us bleed for a week when not pregnant AND to top it off you make PMS symptoms and pregnancy symptoms the SAME?!? YOU'RE AN ASSHOLE. I really had myself psyched out this time.. I wish I could stop that. DH, actually, fuck that. I'm not using all the damn secret code letters, we're Fucking grown ups. My husband thinks I'm insane to worry so much, but I've known for years something was wrong.. I just didn't know what.

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